There is enough things for you to worry about in your day to day to be constantly having a social leech on your back. You know the type, they see you about to give the thumbs up, and they are always right there to remind you why you should put your thumb away or turn it to the downward position. These people can be spotted by making squish face at anything you are talking about that resembles sunlight. These people have got to go! There are people that walk into a room and the room lights up and the mood shifts immediately, there are also the kind of folks that walk into a room and everyone stops talking, move out because they want to avoid contact with this person. At work I understand all you can do is avoid the best you can, but have to interact with from time to time. I’m talking about the people you surround yourself with by choice. These are the people that make me want to head butt a unicorn! In a social gathering these are typically the kind of people who don’t listen very well and are always trying to steer the conversation back to what’s on their poop list. Not even waiting on their turn but using terms like “I hate to change the subject but…” See, already used the word hate in their introduction to the conversation already being had. Only sewage is about to follow, trust me. I’m sorry but did the middle of our conversation interrupt the beginning of yours? These types are also the universal know it alls who let you finish your statement then add something such as “also” or “another thing about it is” those are buffers to give their mind something to contribute when they actually have nothing to add, but need to be noticed and a valued part of the conversation. Listen to what comes after “also” or “another thing about it is” 9 times out of 10 the brain panics and reverts back to its initial program set, negativity, to give input when there was nothing really to input to begin with. The negative person also will repeat the same exact point several times in a row. This happens when they don’t see you react like they think you should. This is where they tell it over and over again, trying to bait you into the conversation, adding your own negative comments to a situation that is rarely something to flip so hard on. He He, I said hard on. When you take that bait and engage the negative person, you are actively working your mind to dig for negative thoughts on the situation at hand. That programs your brain to snap to negative thoughts after so long automatically. No different than a trained reaction such as Pavlov and the bell experiment, or when your phone bings and you, out of trained habit, pick it up and start responding no matter what is going on around you. This is the type of programing and actions that can derail your mission to achieve your goals. Failure has no better friend than the negative programed mind. If you call someone dumb enough times, eventually they will start to believe it. That is not how you reach you goal!
Now that you have an idea of how to identify these people, start weeding them out of your life. Enough of a positive change they will leave on their own accord. There is also the direct approach, tell them why you can’t have them around any longer. Make no mistake, you will be talked about badly to mutual friends. Negative person will not care about why you cast them aside, all they care about now is to get to the rest of your mutual friends in a room and begin vomiting negativity all over you and your goal. Your goal will be cheap, fruitless, and guaranteed to fail in their conversation about you. They will even bring up past failures and use that to sway a conversation in their negative way. Hold on there is more. One of those friends is going to come back to you and tell you, “negative was talking real bad about you the other night”. Guess what that is. That is negative reaching you with their disease through a host. You cannot get wrapped up in it. If you do, you will be back at square one. Feeling like you are no longer a part of the group will also make you revert back if you let it bother you. Believe me, cut ties, say hello in passing if you must, but you can make new friends with like goals. I have done it! There is nothing that chaps negatives ass more than seeing someone break off from the hive and become goal oriented and achieving said goals. Believe me when I say they will never shut up about you, and lets be honest, do you really want to be a part of “friends” that live to see you fail because they are too afraid to reach for their own goals? Believe me, it is easier to stay with the hive, but before you know it, years have passed and all you have done is waste years not working on who and where you want to be, instead you have spent years having empty conversations about things that never really bothered you in the first place. It’s not too late. Cut those ties, lets work together on achieving your goals! You will not regret it. I believe in you!